Hello, I'm Flawed, Nice To Meet You
1. I’ve cried myself out
Not sure what’s happened here but I used to cry easily; swirling theme music, elephants, coffee ads of fathers and sons and when babies were born. All perfectly normal.
Now it seems the river has run dry.
(Apart from A Star is Born when, good lord, I was literally moving climate change up a level one-handed as I wept copiously into my popcorn.)
Now when the time calls for a welling up and I’m looking into the eyes of a general crying situation, there’s nada, nothing, zip. I am the owner of a stone, cold heart.
My concern is this will all implode at a terribly inappropriate moment.
You’ve been warned.
2. I use a microwave
Look I know, I know!
Microwaves are on the bad list and somehow or other in a completely legit sciencey way will kill all our food and infect us and as we speak are probably creating aliens inside me.
To be fair I only use it for two things and it’s never reheating food because even I have standards. I make my coconut or almond milk extra, extra hot for my hideous homemade coffees and I cook my oats in it which I consume year-round because I just do.
But it’s there. In my kitchen amongst the hand crafted wooden boards and mason jars and hemp seeds keeping me real.
3. I think about my weight way, way too much
As in always. I am always driven by my weight and I hate saying this so much because I have a daughter and throughout her growing-up years (with us, as I still consider her my baby and will interfere as such FOR EVER no matter where she lives) I didn’t weigh myself, didn’t talk about good or bad foods and tried so hard to make our home life a non-obsessive food-driven environment. But who knows? Maybe I really fucked it up anyway.
Point is, I’ve put on a small amount of weight recently which as much as I’d like to put down to being peri-menopausal or fully-menopausal or just completely hormonally crazy wackadoo is messing with my head big time.
Whenever someone says, you look well, I fully interpret it as, wow, girl, you’ve packed it on. Which is completely non-reactive and sane.
Of course, if it’s not hormone driven (and it would really suit me to think it is), there’s a slight possibility that it could be because I eat irregular ‘meals’, can chow down on the darkest chocolate like it’s my job and toast features highly on my food pyramid. Vegetables I eat straight from the fridge as apparently cutting them is exhausting and I’m SO busy. Yawn.
So yeah, there’s that.
Hi, I’m back! Didn’t want to draw attention to it but *whispers* I have a big mouth and it’s been quite a few months since last posting.
So tell me stuff: Do you cry? Use a microwave? Obsess over your weight when you know that’s a slap in the face for all the self-lovers out there?
Also, I would appreciate greatly if you’d sign up to the blog (on Blog page). That way I can get a feel for if you would like me to post more often, on a regular basis, daily even??? Eeeek!
Let me know and big love to you! x
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© The Yoga Connection 2018